OH MY GOD! It's been a whole week since I last posted. Cannot say much except that it's been another busy week for me...

My house-sitting time will be over in just a couple of weeks and I haven't managed to get as much done as I had hoped. However, I have been making up for lost time over the past seven days as well as get a couple of karaoke nights in.

I have been working on a t-shirt for a friend that says "Help Wanted: Hunky Man Slave" in Chinese characters. It's been a bit problematic but a great learning experience. I can only get better at it. I will also try to make one for myself. I will also make some that say "spam" and "white person noodle house". I think it only fair to do this as there are many badly composed English products made in other countries. I'd also like to try my hand at Hindi shirts.

I will also be able to finish writing some more letters and try my hand at quilting before I go home...

I would also like to say that for the first time in a long time I saw something that made me gag and almost vomit. This doesn't happen to me too often but yesterday took the cake.

I was standing at a bus stop downtown when I hear someone coughing and hacking just steps from me. I look over to see this 50+ year old woman (or at least she looked that old) coughing up what seemed like a lung. All the while, she had a cigarette in her right hand and a coffee in the other. She was uncontrollable and I am sure that bits of her lung came up. That is when I have the almost unstoppable urge to "woof my cookies". Had I had the guts I would have yelled "Have another drag'... or at least put her out of her misery.

One final thing today that I would like to comment on. I have been seeing ads all over for the ALDO fights Aids campaign which I find totally brave and honourable. However, I also wonder how effective such a campaign can be when even leaders of countries cannot stick to programs meant to curb it.

I was reading in the Guardian about a program in Swasiland that banned girls from having sex until they were 18 being officially abandoned by the polygamist king. Granted the campaign was a little drastic but if we don't have drastic policies, then this disease will continue. If the mindset of the people and their leaders does not change, the situation will continue.

In an ideal world, campaigns like the one that Aldo and Youth Aids are running should do the trick. Unfortunately, if only parts of the world buy into it then aren't we going up the creek with no paddle?

It's Tuesday and not a whole lot has been happening for me besides my day job. Except, however, that a friend is in the hospital with what might be a cancerous tumour. Last night, I went to visit and smuggled in some food from the outside... knowing how much hospital food sucks. Hopefully the results of the tests are back soon and we are more clear on what has happened.

Funny. I was not reminded of my mortality when I went to visit. Instead, it was good to see that he was in high spirits and that the hospital had a funky look to it - in that they haven't renovated that wing since they added the new parts to that particular hospital. It was a pleasant enough colour - probably to keep the patients calm.

My mortality is inevitable anyway. There's not much point in worrying about it.

Wow! There's a full moon tonight.

That'll make things interesting...

Well, we've all survived another week and it seems like a really good opportunity to enjoy ourselves for a couple of days. Don't think about the next week, let's just live for the moment.

The forecast for the weather is that it will be hot, hot, hot here for the next couple of days. That's fine if you just happen to be a cockroach but for me, I am thinking that it'll be two days not to overexert myself. Personally, I can think of better ways to become hot and sweaty but well, I suppose that the vitamin D we get from the sun isn't so bad either.

I understand that filming for X-Men 3 has wrapped up which means that my fantasy of hooking up with Patrick is dashed once again. No chance for hot and sweaty there, I suppose, but isn't that really what fantasies are all about? Don't get me wrong, I am not at all into much older guys but I think the accent and that head are what does it for me with him. I will have to return to my usual life now. Time to find someone a little more real...

For other celebrity news, I suppose that everyone has heard of Matt LeBlanc's run-in with a stripper in Victoria. I was sure that I had posted something about this earlier but on a closer look see that I haven't. It appears that Mr. LeBlanc is blaming it on the alcohol that he consumed but if you ask me, alcohol just allows those "real" feelings to come out so, he's as much to blame as the stripper. The way I heard it was that he was just as willing. I haven't been to Monty's lately but with this news, it seems like I should definitely check it out again. Who knows what fun can ensue. One of the last times I was there, some guy tried to pick up a friend of mine and I to have fun with him and his wife...

Anyway all, have a great weekend and if I am really motivated in the heat and I experience anything that I should share with you, I may post. If not, I will see you next week!

I am seriously considering telling people refer to me as Mistress.

I don't know why. It just seems like a really good idea. Maybe because I like to boss people around.

It appears that my posts have become the topic of an online notice board. You can read it here but you will have to scroll down to Retroman.

Also, apparently, I only have two more days to fulfill my "Patrick" fantasy. I have made a pact with a couple of friends that if any of us sees the X-Men cast member of any of our dreams that we are to immediately pass on the phone number of the person who has the fantasy. Filming ends here tomorrow so time is limited. So, Halle, Rebecca or Patrick, if you are out there, give us a shout!

Yesterday, I went by the restaurant where I am showing my photographs and was told an amusing story by one of the owners. He told me of a story of some people who had been eating at the restaurant and were looking at some of the portraits I had taken. It was mostly of a conversation that he overheard from them.

For a bit of background, these portraits are of some people from Japan that I know and there are three of them, hanging side-by-side on the same wall. They are monochrome prints and, in my opinion, really capture their inner personality. The restaurant is a Chinese one with food that is very "Hong Kong" in style with a bakery that sells the best buns ever.

Anyway, this group of Caucasian people sat at a big table situated in front of these photos and they started to talk about how they had seen these people before. Not strange, I thought because they live here. But, as their conversation went on, they seemed convinced that the people in these photos must have been protestors at Tiananmen Square in 1989 and that they must know them from having seen their faces on the news. I literally burst into laughter when he told me this.

Firstly, it is not so hard to believe that Caucasians cannot distinguish between the Japanese and Chinese, although it irritates me. Secondly, why would a Chinese restaurant in a small city in Victoria be hanging photos of people incarcerated for protesting in Tiananmen. A Hong Kong style restaurant at that.

Some people...

I was just reminded of an incident while reading this entry on the Three Angry Guys site.

Jason wrote about a female performance artist who stripped naked at the Vancouver Art Gallery and the "adventure" that ensued. I was feeling sorry for myself having not been there to see such an uninhibited act, and I was reminded of a time when I went with a Japanese photographer friend to a gay nightclub in Vancouver. It started off being nothing special... a typical visit to a gay club (except for the fact that this Japanese girl was not typical in that she danced right away without having to get drunk to do it) with the usual sorts hanging out, dancing and scoping the place for that one special boy to take home.

It got really crowded after a while making it both difficult to dance and wander around or sit and drink but our attention turned to this very fit young man with those black biking shorts who began dancing on a speaker. It turned out that he was paid to dance there which makes sense. Neither of us could shake the feeling that he had a sock or two shoved down the front of his shorts because surely he couldn't be THAT big. We thought it must have been for dramatic effect but later discovered, after he had removed those biking shorts that it was no optical illusion. Even I had a hard time believing it but my friend summed it up in her own words as we left that night. She simply said "Thank you" and then "I never expected in my life to see something like that in anything but photos."

We never spoke of it again but I thought of it today after my post earlier.

Which is mainly because I wondered whether gay and straight men have this issue in common. I imagine that they would think about for different reasons but surely there is some sort of mental comparison. Kind of like the way women strive for some sort of ideal...

What do you say? Care to share your thoughts on this one?

Does penis size really matter to the men out there?

Ladies, what do you think? Is there any merit to the expression "Size doesn't matter, it's how well it's used"? I think that there probably is something to that school of thought, don't you think? Or do we just say it to make men feel better? If so, we should stop fooling ourselves. And them.

And to the men out there, is there a universal thought on size? Do you ever compare with others? Do straight men and gay men agree or are their thoughts on size totally different?

I've just been wondering...

I finally got around to seeing The Island yesterday. I am glad that I went to see it because not only did Ewan and Scarlett look hot in those white suits, the story was interesting and thought-provoking. There is something a little foreboding about these tales of the future.

On the adventure front, this past weekend was a little on the boring side but I did manage to get some things done. I actually even went to the gym on a Saturday. I must say that, after seeing how fit the main characters in this film were, I was inspired to head to the gym more often.

It's funny really because I have always just enjoyed life but the thought of living in a out-of-shape body into my retirement age gives me a strong urge to get off my butt and do some exercise. I am eating more vegetables and drinking more water over the past while but I really do have to be more serious about the whole thing. After all, the longer I wait to do something about it, the longer is will take me to drop some weight and get into way better shape.

Isn't it funny that these "more convenient and easier" lives we have now are leading the way to our lethargy and subsequent overweightedness? Who would've thought that this job that I have sitting in front of a computer all day would mean that I become overweight? Perhaps it's time for a revolution of sorts.

Now that we live longer than a few generations ago, we have to take better care of ourselves. If we don't, perhaps the society created in the film I watched last night isn't so far-fetched. We could grow new bodies and just use the "clone" as replacement parts. But, at what price would this come.

I don't know about you but I would rather get out there, eat more healthy and get some exercise. Funny, even though I haven't had extremely speedy results, I find I feel much more sexy when I have been exercising...

Perhaps that is what many of us need. To take more pride and to feel comfortable in our bodies...

If any of you has wondered what Rachel Stevens from S Club 7 has been up to since she left the group, you can check out one of her recent activities at Rachel Gets Fruity. (Even if you are not that interested in Ms. Stevens, guys especially, I would suggest you give it a look.)

Special thanks to Olivia from Yummy Wakame for the link!

I saw Hugh Jackman tonight and he was carrying a diaper bag...

Oh, and he was walking with another guy (who was pushing a pram...presumably with a baby in it) and two women. It's funny because he didn't have an entourage and it seemed perfectly normal that he would be walking down the streets of this small city in British Columbia.

And, in case you were wondering, I didn't ask for an autograph. Now, had it been Patrick, I would have just melted...

It looks like I missed an opportunity to meet Patrick this morning! I was riding by one of the restaurants downtown and saw it being used as a film set which could only mean that he was there! (They are filming X-Men 3 here now) Damn this job! I should have just gotten off the bus and skived off for today.

I wish I weren't so responsible...

Which of the following is the best news source for you? The BBC, Guardian Unlimited, or Reuters?

In today’s fast-paced and modern life, how does one find true love?

Are we even supposed to?

I find myself thinking about love and relationships more lately. Having reached that forty-second birthday and finding myself still without that elusive partner, I question love and whether there is something strange about being without it. Is it bad to still be alone at this age?

What I find totally amusing is that, even though I haven’t found love, there are people out there who ask me to help them find it. I have to laugh when this happens because I am hardly an authority on the subject. I cannot even find myself a date! I am guessing that, it is not because I am an expert but because I have been around a lot longer than most of these people. I suppose in this case, age beats out beauty in the quest for love.

Only for love that is not mine…

What intrigues me most is why people assume that I am able to help them. What is it in my nature that makes people believe that I can help them with this? I would be really interested because I don’t think I exude wisdom.

I was telling someone yesterday that, when I was in college, I was infatuated with one of my classmates. We were good friends and it wasn’t unusual for him to talk to me about his relationship difficulties. Having never had the guts to tell him that I liked him, he probably had no idea and just talked freely about anything. I never, ever told him. I was a fool! I liked our friendship and felt that it would just complicate things. Actually, I think that I feared rejection more than anything and that is why I never mentioned it.

Nevertheless, people still look to me for advice. Amusing, non?

I was watching this Japanese program at a friend's place today. It was called "Suyou dou desshou?" and was created for the web. Apparently it got so popular, they aired it on television.

It is about these two Japanese guys who, with the aid of a guide and a translator, participated in a challenge in which they had to travel through 160 kilometres of the Yukon (by canoe, I think). Neither of these guys can handle a canoe and they seem pretty hopeless in other areas. I suppose that there was a camera crew along for the ride as it's been recorded on camera.

If you are interested, you can check it out here.

If someone asked you whether it was alright to fantasize about someone, even though you were in love (and had been for a long time) with a stable partner, what would your answer be?

I had this question asked of me the other night. My answer was that if it was simply a fantasy, and never acted upon, I thought it perfectly natural. I suppose though if that fantasy took up all of my waking hours, that it might not be so healthy but we all have them. It is also necessary to share these things with your partner.

Some have desires for fame, money and, of course, of a sexual nature. It is part of human nature to have these thoughts and I don't think that having a partner makes us any less susceptible to them. I would expect that partner to be honest about it with me and then we can both feel work together to understand it.

The problem is that sometimes people don't want to hear that their "other half" desires someone else. They get the thought in their head that maybe they aren't as desirable as they had been. I mean why would the partner desire someone else other than for the reason that they were bored or didn't care about them any more. The funny thing is that I don't think that this is the case when people have these fantasies.

The truth is, we can all get into a rut. We want excitement and to have the same thing night after night does not facilitate that very well. Even if you have the same very expensive and tasty dinner every night, you will still get bored with it. It's just human nature.

I think that we have to be honest about our fantasies. If not, we are submerging these feelings and are more likely to act on them for real. If it were me, I would want to share these things with a partner. Who knows, it might be fun to work on it together...

What do YOU think?

Being born on the 3rd day of the month is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life. The energy of 3 allows you to bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental. There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, "couldn't care less" attitude.

You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression. Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing. You are energetic and always a good conversationalist.

You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too many superficial matters.

You are affectionate and loving, but sometimes too sensitive. You are subject to rapid ups and downs.

I found this on my computer today. I thought it fitting as tomorrow is, well, you know...

It's the day before my birthday and I have been doing what I normally do at this time of year - get all contemplative about me and my life. Funny how it happens around birthdays...

People ask me what I want to do to mark the occasion but it seems that to celebrate is more for their benefit than mine. I don't do birthdays very well. Mainly because it's the one day of the year that a person is allowed to be the centre of attention without being criticized about doing it. After that, you need to fade into the woodwork and don't rock the boat. The truth is I want to have more than one day a year in which I don't feel guilty about being the awesome person that I am.

I could say that I really just want world peace for my birthday but I want that every day. I want people to be accepted by others for their beliefs even though there is no doubt going to be disagreements. Chances are though, that it won't happen this year as it hasn't in the many years before now that I just hoped that everyone can just get along.

Instead, this year I am going to be more selfish.

I was born in a time where to think of yourself before others was selfish. A person's own happiness was always to be sacrificed so that others can be happy. It is very difficult to shake this way of thinking and I know it will be tough to give up something that is so deeply engrained in my nature.

This year, I am going to wish for the strength to change those things in myself that are hindering me from the things that I truly deserve. Up until now, I depended on those around me to measure my success. After all, if people viewed me as successful, then I really must be. The problem was that I didn't really believe it myself.

This year, I am going to love myself more and to those who think that is selfish, just get over it!

I am Leo, hear me roar!